I care, but I dont care. Im irritated,.. but for me to sincerely give a fuck is against my nature. Im speaking of today's incident-the loss, and subsequent theft of my phone by some unknown assailant. Allow me to tell the tale. Upon my umi's (mother's) suggestion, I decided to treat my umi and my dear sun to an afternoon delight of ice cream. The first destination, the local ice cream/ soft serve shop, was closed because, ironically, their machine had frozen. At this point, feelings of defeat abound...but hey, my umi wants some ice cream..so gotdamnit, she's gonna get some! Thinking of alternatives, she suggests that we just go to the bodega to see if they have any ice cream bars--negative..they have all but one solitary Good Humor strawberry shortcake left in the freezer case. SHIT! Now mind you..this this whole little ice cream adventure was on foot, because I was taking my sun on his afternoon walk. So..we sit for a moment. Im thinking. There's a Baskin Robins up the street..not really THAT far, but on a humid ass summer day, its fuckin far enough. So I put it out there..bcuz I want my umi to get her damn ice cream. (Of course) she's up to it, I check the kiddo-he seems up to it..so its decided, and we're on our way to the damn Baskin Robins. Along the way, the kiddo and I play and fool around..chasing each other, playin hide n' seek, kicking rocks..the sorta juvenile, fun shit that toddlers enjoi. So..we finally arrive at the Baskin Robins. She gets a scoop of Basketball Nut (the flavor of the month), the kiddo gets a kiddie sized soft serve cup, and I get a double scoop-one of Pistachio Almond and one of Very Berry Strawberry. I pay, we go outside, and finally eat our ice cream. -All is well in the world-. With the ice cream smashed, we rid ourselves of the empty containers and head back for my house. (More juvenile, fun shit ensues.) Damn near a half block before I reach my house, I see a cell phone back (the piece that covers the battery) on the ground. Triggers thought.."where's MY phone?" (Looks down..not on hip where it normally resides.) Awww FUCK!! Think back, think back. Hmmm. Had it at destinations one and two...destination three..not so sure. Operation Retrace Steps, engage. I back tracked every step, but to no avail. So..my conclusion is that when we were sitting, it slid off my hip, unbeknownst to me, and fell in the mulch beside me, bcuz that would be the only time that I would neither feel or hear it hit the ground. Someone clearly picked up.....probably beside them self with glee, having found a brand new touch sceen. Obviously, I call........I try three times, leaving a voicemail the last time informing the person that the service will be shut off within the next hour. I call my carrier, then the claims' folk...yada yada yada..so on and so forth.
So..thats the tale.
Im not really irrated that I lost the phone..Im moreso irrated that people dont have integrity. Now, I understand that the allure of finding a brand new phone somewhere is mighty appealing to folk..trust me, I know..bcuz Ive been on the other side of the situation a few different times. But Ive always returned the phone to the owner..one-bcuz I would want someone to do that for me, two-bcuz its the right thing to do, and three-bcuz I know invaluable our phones are to us. Mofos were damn near ready to kiss me for returning their phones, and understandibly so. The fact that people would keep an item they found, that they KNOW its owner is looking for, is beyond me. Yet and still..people do this kinda shit every-fuckin-day,..but then have the gull to be mad at "them muthafuckas" when they find themself in a similar, unfortunate situation. -Fuckin mind boggling-
In the end..its jus a phone...I'll get a brand new one in the mail in a few days...the shit really isnt that deep.
But its the principle of the thing.
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
Rude, Crude World
Written June 18, 2010
-a world in turmoil-
its a sad day in existence
when the soil breathes oil,
when companies cant see beyond their bottom line
and only to profits are loyal
indeed, a sad moment in time..
when careless indifference
causes leaks in pipelines
that continues to seep
"black gold" for weeks and weeks,
rain or shine,
destroyin a local industry
that makes its living utilizin nets and fishlines
destroyin habitat and animal rights,
cuttin down their quality of lyfe
with a BP endorsed knife,
killin everthing it touches,
-land mines-
muthafuckas get arrested for dutches,
over small change,
nickles and dimes,
while those responsible
for this catastrophe, phenomenal
FREE AS FUCK!!,
stay extending a bogus timeline,
somebody needs to take my statement,
cuz Ive witnessed a HEINOUS crime
against humanity,
and if YOURE not pissed the FUCK OFF,
YOU SHOULD BE
surrounded by padded walls
for mental defect
-insanity-
cuz we got this ONE planet, see..
and if we
fuck it up, we're up shit's creek
like a dude doin anal with dukey on the "D",
lyfe as we know it would become a distant and beautifully tragic memory
so keep ya eyes glued to the powers that be
cuz we live and die together,
for worse or for better,
this rock is OUR home,
so what happens on and to it
is OUR responsibility
-a world in turmoil-
its a sad day in existence
when the soil breathes oil,
when companies cant see beyond their bottom line
and only to profits are loyal
indeed, a sad moment in time..
when careless indifference
causes leaks in pipelines
that continues to seep
"black gold" for weeks and weeks,
rain or shine,
destroyin a local industry
that makes its living utilizin nets and fishlines
destroyin habitat and animal rights,
cuttin down their quality of lyfe
with a BP endorsed knife,
killin everthing it touches,
-land mines-
muthafuckas get arrested for dutches,
over small change,
nickles and dimes,
while those responsible
for this catastrophe, phenomenal
FREE AS FUCK!!,
stay extending a bogus timeline,
somebody needs to take my statement,
cuz Ive witnessed a HEINOUS crime
against humanity,
and if YOURE not pissed the FUCK OFF,
YOU SHOULD BE
surrounded by padded walls
for mental defect
-insanity-
cuz we got this ONE planet, see..
and if we
fuck it up, we're up shit's creek
like a dude doin anal with dukey on the "D",
lyfe as we know it would become a distant and beautifully tragic memory
so keep ya eyes glued to the powers that be
cuz we live and die together,
for worse or for better,
this rock is OUR home,
so what happens on and to it
is OUR responsibility
Worth The Wait
Written June 17, 2010
I get approached on a regular
too many dudes to name,
but Im benchin myself
cuz Ive already been hurt
too many times in the game,
shit's always the same,
in the beginning they luv my freedom of thought
but they always eventually try to tame
..by tryin to break my spirit
so that my mind and heart would be in chains,
but we aint 'upstate'
my freedom doesnt take a break
had to ice that ass;
frost that cake,
got a taste of it,
realized I couldnt fuck wit it,
so I tossed the plate,
..but sometimes my heart's on that platter,
and SOMETIMES when that platter DOES shatter,
as a consequence
of momentarily lackin sense,
SOMETIMES my heart DOES break,
over the bullshit and possibilities
of the "what could be"s
that I chose to forsake
..sometimes..
in my mind, I debate
..whats at stake IS worth the wait..
(?)
..RIGHT?!?..
I mean,.. the time it takes
to grace upon a proper and personalized mate
could be many years,
plus a fortnight
..so I might as well date..(?)
conclusion:
............
..Im str8..
Im willin to take my time,
willing to further evolve my mind,
willin to luv myself and shine,
til that moment sublime,
when I am he
and he is I,
and in the skyy
all things align,
wish I could fast forward thru time,
but I'll patiently wait in line,
bcuz the line of women that Im from
and the one I'll become,
is definitely worth waitin for mine
I get approached on a regular
too many dudes to name,
but Im benchin myself
cuz Ive already been hurt
too many times in the game,
shit's always the same,
in the beginning they luv my freedom of thought
but they always eventually try to tame
..by tryin to break my spirit
so that my mind and heart would be in chains,
but we aint 'upstate'
my freedom doesnt take a break
had to ice that ass;
frost that cake,
got a taste of it,
realized I couldnt fuck wit it,
so I tossed the plate,
..but sometimes my heart's on that platter,
and SOMETIMES when that platter DOES shatter,
as a consequence
of momentarily lackin sense,
SOMETIMES my heart DOES break,
over the bullshit and possibilities
of the "what could be"s
that I chose to forsake
..sometimes..
in my mind, I debate
..whats at stake IS worth the wait..
(?)
..RIGHT?!?..
I mean,.. the time it takes
to grace upon a proper and personalized mate
could be many years,
plus a fortnight
..so I might as well date..(?)
conclusion:
............
..Im str8..
Im willin to take my time,
willing to further evolve my mind,
willin to luv myself and shine,
til that moment sublime,
when I am he
and he is I,
and in the skyy
all things align,
wish I could fast forward thru time,
but I'll patiently wait in line,
bcuz the line of women that Im from
and the one I'll become,
is definitely worth waitin for mine
A Survivor's Story
Written June 17, 2010
my heart was an open wound
which, due to your gesture
was to decay and fester
leaving only a skeleton
-remnants in luv's tomb-
there was no peace,
no sweet release,
from the dead elephant inside the room
jus the lingerin stench of luv lost
and deceased
..a toxic, necrotic perfume..
so unfortunate
this escapade,
put into motion
by your heart of jade,
made my luv's lyfe light
fade to shade
like dusk's warm glow on evenins in June
ironically
the debt that was sacrificially paid
-when i gave you my heart
and you gave it your blade-
purchased future immunity
from infectious wounds to be made
slowly but surely
returning to myself
regaining my emotional, physical, and spiritual health
I cashed/ (cast) you out,
..almost cost me everything..
but yet and still..
I have my wealth
youve dropped off my radar
and its not bcuz you engaged your stealth
I let you go
ended that show
it wasnt my time
and I wasnt gonna let you
kill me slow
removed your fangs
from my arterial flow
im past your bullshit
fuck a luv thats counterfeit
headin in a new direction thats legit
and "Roger That..all systems GO!"
so now im free
with a new found ability to see
the likes of your kind
and others unworthy of me
you were the kiss of death
but miraculously
I survived your injury
IM PURGED OF THEE!
..finally..
a survivor's story
ghost written by you
edited and adopted by me
my heart was an open wound
which, due to your gesture
was to decay and fester
leaving only a skeleton
-remnants in luv's tomb-
there was no peace,
no sweet release,
from the dead elephant inside the room
jus the lingerin stench of luv lost
and deceased
..a toxic, necrotic perfume..
so unfortunate
this escapade,
put into motion
by your heart of jade,
made my luv's lyfe light
fade to shade
like dusk's warm glow on evenins in June
ironically
the debt that was sacrificially paid
-when i gave you my heart
and you gave it your blade-
purchased future immunity
from infectious wounds to be made
slowly but surely
returning to myself
regaining my emotional, physical, and spiritual health
I cashed/ (cast) you out,
..almost cost me everything..
but yet and still..
I have my wealth
youve dropped off my radar
and its not bcuz you engaged your stealth
I let you go
ended that show
it wasnt my time
and I wasnt gonna let you
kill me slow
removed your fangs
from my arterial flow
im past your bullshit
fuck a luv thats counterfeit
headin in a new direction thats legit
and "Roger That..all systems GO!"
so now im free
with a new found ability to see
the likes of your kind
and others unworthy of me
you were the kiss of death
but miraculously
I survived your injury
IM PURGED OF THEE!
..finally..
a survivor's story
ghost written by you
edited and adopted by me
My Point Five
Written April 11, 2010
luv,
you may not be the "ONE',
but,
if you add your half
and do the math,
our union will still manifest
the same sum
..knowledge..,
I understand wisdom,
so dont begin to think
that I dont understand where youre coming from
spiritually,
U-N-I verse,
occasionally,
over different rhythms,
but always to the same drum
we share musicality,
I am your right hand,
your melody,
and you are my left,
my baseline,
stayin in time
and in key,
..in balance..
so when we are together,
we are in harmony
there is no such reality
as you harmin' me,
yes..,
we both may test
the others' nerves
while in contest
-quarreling-
over stupid shit,
no less,
but that shows and proves nothing
except that we are human,
like the rest
living,
learning,
and luving,
in this here physical world,
that epitomizes "a perfect mess"
and makes it necessary
for me to be your "Whoo-sah"
and you to be my dopamine,
...here to relieve the stress,
you ARE my comfort level...
you warm my soul
and relieve my tension,
like the effect of fire to a tea kettle,
you are living proof of the reason
why I dont settle,
dont meddle
in the romantic ties
of other womens' lives,
for I have no interest in real lyfe soap operas,
just interest in keepin me and my god
physically, spiritually, emotionally, and intellectually satisfied
keeping trust and respect ever present between us
so there's no need for lies,
no need to hide
to whom much is given,
much is expected,
but I take it all in stride
so,
my point five,
lets continue to build our cipher
and keep it alive
bcuz I need you
and you need me,
not to live,
but to thrive
luv,
you may not be the "ONE',
but,
if you add your half
and do the math,
our union will still manifest
the same sum
..knowledge..,
I understand wisdom,
so dont begin to think
that I dont understand where youre coming from
spiritually,
U-N-I verse,
occasionally,
over different rhythms,
but always to the same drum
we share musicality,
I am your right hand,
your melody,
and you are my left,
my baseline,
stayin in time
and in key,
..in balance..
so when we are together,
we are in harmony
there is no such reality
as you harmin' me,
yes..,
we both may test
the others' nerves
while in contest
-quarreling-
over stupid shit,
no less,
but that shows and proves nothing
except that we are human,
like the rest
living,
learning,
and luving,
in this here physical world,
that epitomizes "a perfect mess"
and makes it necessary
for me to be your "Whoo-sah"
and you to be my dopamine,
...here to relieve the stress,
you ARE my comfort level...
you warm my soul
and relieve my tension,
like the effect of fire to a tea kettle,
you are living proof of the reason
why I dont settle,
dont meddle
in the romantic ties
of other womens' lives,
for I have no interest in real lyfe soap operas,
just interest in keepin me and my god
physically, spiritually, emotionally, and intellectually satisfied
keeping trust and respect ever present between us
so there's no need for lies,
no need to hide
to whom much is given,
much is expected,
but I take it all in stride
so,
my point five,
lets continue to build our cipher
and keep it alive
bcuz I need you
and you need me,
not to live,
but to thrive
Cardiac Arrest
Written April 7, 2010
you left my heart
H.E.A.V.Y.,
misused,
uncared for,
til it broke like NOLA's levee
remedy in a pinch
patch work fix
you purse your lips
..kiss it to make it better..
that usually does the trick
...usually...
revives the spark
but apparently,
youve watered down and simplified
the QRS complex of my heart
no lyfeline
you single-handedly robbed my most vital organ
of its self sustaining desire to restart
to renew
its grown weak as a result
of all the bullshit its had to endure with you
damn near killed itself tryin to
sustain lyfe for two
your selfish ass
luved my selfless ass
for all the selfless shit I'd naturally do
..selflessly gave..
..selflessly paid..
..selflessly saved..
in the name of "Us"
while you gave..?
WHAT?!!?
stress
heartache
and mounting feelins of mistrust
with me,
faithful to you,
all the while you succumb to your lust
at one time,
my heart drew strength from my luv for you,
now,
its only weakened with disgust
for your lack of commitment
and lack of concern
left fatally wounded to the third degree
no Milk Of Magnesia could pacify my agonizing heart burn
..so..
broken and luvless...
accelerated the rapid onset
of acute cardiac arrest
...
b.u.t.
...
before my last breath
at least,
I reached the point of no return
having LEARNED
from my heart's regret
you left my heart
H.E.A.V.Y.,
misused,
uncared for,
til it broke like NOLA's levee
remedy in a pinch
patch work fix
you purse your lips
..kiss it to make it better..
that usually does the trick
...usually...
revives the spark
but apparently,
youve watered down and simplified
the QRS complex of my heart
no lyfeline
you single-handedly robbed my most vital organ
of its self sustaining desire to restart
to renew
its grown weak as a result
of all the bullshit its had to endure with you
damn near killed itself tryin to
sustain lyfe for two
your selfish ass
luved my selfless ass
for all the selfless shit I'd naturally do
..selflessly gave..
..selflessly paid..
..selflessly saved..
in the name of "Us"
while you gave..?
WHAT?!!?
stress
heartache
and mounting feelins of mistrust
with me,
faithful to you,
all the while you succumb to your lust
at one time,
my heart drew strength from my luv for you,
now,
its only weakened with disgust
for your lack of commitment
and lack of concern
left fatally wounded to the third degree
no Milk Of Magnesia could pacify my agonizing heart burn
..so..
broken and luvless...
accelerated the rapid onset
of acute cardiac arrest
...
b.u.t.
...
before my last breath
at least,
I reached the point of no return
having LEARNED
from my heart's regret
So Excited
Written December 2, 2009
you have my full attention,
undivided,
as well as all other aspects of me,
they're all provided..
cuz you got my soul
SO excited..
there was a vacant space in my heart,
for my other half,
my missing part,
..but you are now invited
to dwell and occupy it
for as long as its desired,
by you..
see, Im hopin that I dont have to,
but Im willin to play the fool..
if thats what I need to do
to get the kind of knowledge and experience
that one can not attain thru contemporary skool..
I am askin you to be my Luv,..
Guru,
my teacher..
and I will gladly be your tool..
to cut away the "Old ME"
until the "New ME" shines thru..
as a reflection of you..
..a Divine Being..
lets live and be one with God,
so that besides ourselves,
our entire world only encompasses two..
and for I,
that is "He" and you..
"He", as my Divine Creator
and you, as my King..
easily recognized as royalty,
even without the adornments and rings,
crowns and such things,
that only a superficial woman would fiend..
I jus hope to be the one worthy enough to be called your Queen,..
worthy enough to bear you seed..
for I wish to be the embodiment of ALL that you need..
the food from which you feed,
the air from which you breathe,
the knowledge from which you read,
and the accomplice in your sexual greed,..
I will never leave..
I will always follow,
as long as you lead..
cuz you got my soul
SO excited..
and I am willing
to do anything
to maintain that which the Divine has provided,
to me..
you have my full attention,
undivided,
as well as all other aspects of me,
they're all provided..
cuz you got my soul
SO excited..
there was a vacant space in my heart,
for my other half,
my missing part,
..but you are now invited
to dwell and occupy it
for as long as its desired,
by you..
see, Im hopin that I dont have to,
but Im willin to play the fool..
if thats what I need to do
to get the kind of knowledge and experience
that one can not attain thru contemporary skool..
I am askin you to be my Luv,..
Guru,
my teacher..
and I will gladly be your tool..
to cut away the "Old ME"
until the "New ME" shines thru..
as a reflection of you..
..a Divine Being..
lets live and be one with God,
so that besides ourselves,
our entire world only encompasses two..
and for I,
that is "He" and you..
"He", as my Divine Creator
and you, as my King..
easily recognized as royalty,
even without the adornments and rings,
crowns and such things,
that only a superficial woman would fiend..
I jus hope to be the one worthy enough to be called your Queen,..
worthy enough to bear you seed..
for I wish to be the embodiment of ALL that you need..
the food from which you feed,
the air from which you breathe,
the knowledge from which you read,
and the accomplice in your sexual greed,..
I will never leave..
I will always follow,
as long as you lead..
cuz you got my soul
SO excited..
and I am willing
to do anything
to maintain that which the Divine has provided,
to me..
Oral Fix
Written November 29, 2009
**HIGHLY Sexual Content, Please Be Advised**
lol
oh,..the things I would do
jus to get the smallest taste of you,
taste of new
lyfe from your loins
taste of you cumin..!!
ooh..!!
let me be the one to
relieve that tension for you
cuz I can tell you the type that likes to be catered to
its been long overdue
Im the type
that'll get you right
have you wonderin
y the fuck I was EVER missin
from your life
makin ya toes curl
while my tongue takes flight
and we jus gettin started,luv..
cuz I can do this shit here, ALL nite
got you makin sounds like..
"..ooh wee..!!
..DAMN, girl..!!
where the fuck you learn THAT shit from..!!?
cuz you dont even seem like
the "freaky type" of girl..!!"
oh,..but I am,bay..
so whateva pleases you
most definitely pleases me
I got an oral fixation..
and you jus became the subject
of my self-therapy,
let me give you a session,
a lesson in the sexual progression
of my top notch head game
before the incredible sexin',
lick the tip
enjoi the shit
using my tongue to spell out the letters
of the alphabet
taste of pre-cum,
swallow it,
but I know there's more where that came from..
mami jus gotta work the shit to get to it..
so let me lather you up,
before I deep throat the dick..
know I hit an incredible stride
cuz thats when he gets to callin me "Bitch..!!"
feelins of ecstasy,
had to take a seat..
for no longer could he stand it
then cums my favorite part,
cuz it leaves us both SO fuckin orgasmic..!!
So fuckin volcanic..!!
lava hot and organic
breaks through the surface in streams,
cumin from the depths of his luv pit,
how I marvel in it,
was raised with proper etiquette
so now, Im such a fuckin lady
that I swallow,
cuz I was taught that REAL ladies never spit..!!
..and its funny how that applies to dick..!!
so please, by all mean, let me know
when you're free and available
cuz I would luv for you to supply me
with my Oral Fix..!
**HIGHLY Sexual Content, Please Be Advised**
lol
oh,..the things I would do
jus to get the smallest taste of you,
taste of new
lyfe from your loins
taste of you cumin..!!
ooh..!!
let me be the one to
relieve that tension for you
cuz I can tell you the type that likes to be catered to
its been long overdue
Im the type
that'll get you right
have you wonderin
y the fuck I was EVER missin
from your life
makin ya toes curl
while my tongue takes flight
and we jus gettin started,luv..
cuz I can do this shit here, ALL nite
got you makin sounds like..
"..ooh wee..!!
..DAMN, girl..!!
where the fuck you learn THAT shit from..!!?
cuz you dont even seem like
the "freaky type" of girl..!!"
oh,..but I am,bay..
so whateva pleases you
most definitely pleases me
I got an oral fixation..
and you jus became the subject
of my self-therapy,
let me give you a session,
a lesson in the sexual progression
of my top notch head game
before the incredible sexin',
lick the tip
enjoi the shit
using my tongue to spell out the letters
of the alphabet
taste of pre-cum,
swallow it,
but I know there's more where that came from..
mami jus gotta work the shit to get to it..
so let me lather you up,
before I deep throat the dick..
know I hit an incredible stride
cuz thats when he gets to callin me "Bitch..!!"
feelins of ecstasy,
had to take a seat..
for no longer could he stand it
then cums my favorite part,
cuz it leaves us both SO fuckin orgasmic..!!
So fuckin volcanic..!!
lava hot and organic
breaks through the surface in streams,
cumin from the depths of his luv pit,
how I marvel in it,
was raised with proper etiquette
so now, Im such a fuckin lady
that I swallow,
cuz I was taught that REAL ladies never spit..!!
..and its funny how that applies to dick..!!
so please, by all mean, let me know
when you're free and available
cuz I would luv for you to supply me
with my Oral Fix..!
King
Written November 9, 2009
there's one particular person
that, from my heart,
I wanted to get a verse in
muscles achy, cause on him
Im diggin
so deep..
he's the type Id love
to be submerged in
got me feelin
mentally,
like a virgin
complex ideologies
got my mind
feelin somethin like a whirlwind
but he's more than..
the average scholar
with a scroll and a pen
street philosophy
with the etiquette and manner
of a Enlightened Gentleman
respected in the hood
so, in turn,
he respects them
Swagg cup,
filled up
in fact it runneth over,
over the King's lips, past his shoulders
got him damp from the Waist Up
got me damp from the waist down
so much sex appeal...,
that if he shared it,
there would be enough to go 'round
ina trance by his charm
I sit, patiently, tied up
without alarm
like a talented magician,
he put me under his spell
leavin me spellbound
wishin he was here now..
not in the Empire State,
Bison town
but it is what it is..
I know one day
it'll definitely go down
and with that thought,
I smile
hopin that in the meanwhile,
despite the distance,
our friendship will be worth enough
to go the extra mile
there's one particular person
that, from my heart,
I wanted to get a verse in
muscles achy, cause on him
Im diggin
so deep..
he's the type Id love
to be submerged in
got me feelin
mentally,
like a virgin
complex ideologies
got my mind
feelin somethin like a whirlwind
but he's more than..
the average scholar
with a scroll and a pen
street philosophy
with the etiquette and manner
of a Enlightened Gentleman
respected in the hood
so, in turn,
he respects them
Swagg cup,
filled up
in fact it runneth over,
over the King's lips, past his shoulders
got him damp from the Waist Up
got me damp from the waist down
so much sex appeal...,
that if he shared it,
there would be enough to go 'round
ina trance by his charm
I sit, patiently, tied up
without alarm
like a talented magician,
he put me under his spell
leavin me spellbound
wishin he was here now..
not in the Empire State,
Bison town
but it is what it is..
I know one day
it'll definitely go down
and with that thought,
I smile
hopin that in the meanwhile,
despite the distance,
our friendship will be worth enough
to go the extra mile
An Ode to the Village
Written November 8, 2009
so many fine men
FINE MEN!!,
I see
lookin good
talkin good
sayin all the right words
to me
eyes glued
cause seein a man
eloquently communicate w/ words
is a beautiful sight to see
...at least to me
the physical feels good
but Id rather be fucked
intellectually
take me to the depths
til ya knowledge flows free
take me to the heights
so into ya mind,
I see
smell, touch, taste
the whole of your mentality
aiming high
keepin my
eyes to the sky
transfixed
watchin that incredible Sparrow fly
beautiful use of words
nouns, adjectives, and adverbs
speakin to my feminine sensibilities
til somethin deep inside me stirs
deep inside me purrs
beautiful paintings,
painted jus wit words
got me lookin so deep into the picture
that the picture blurs
which is more than I deserve
Im here to get betta
Im jus a novice
so I observe
watch and listen
decipherin the depictions
followin,..but sometimes missin
the green light,
gettin lost beyond the curve
and its funny
cause this is jus off the shit
yall got in reserve..!!
but Im good
blessed that this community flourishes
so that I, one day, could
get betta, more cleva
w/out bein misunderstood
so fellas..,
AND queens,
ALL my beautiful black bellas
I appreciate ya skills
cause ya words are real
and the effect of their impact is beyond measure
so if you'll have me
it would be my absolute pleasure..
to call yall my case workers
this beautiful art of speech
serve as my work release
and have the Artist Village be my self imposed tether
so many fine men
FINE MEN!!,
I see
lookin good
talkin good
sayin all the right words
to me
eyes glued
cause seein a man
eloquently communicate w/ words
is a beautiful sight to see
...at least to me
the physical feels good
but Id rather be fucked
intellectually
take me to the depths
til ya knowledge flows free
take me to the heights
so into ya mind,
I see
smell, touch, taste
the whole of your mentality
aiming high
keepin my
eyes to the sky
transfixed
watchin that incredible Sparrow fly
beautiful use of words
nouns, adjectives, and adverbs
speakin to my feminine sensibilities
til somethin deep inside me stirs
deep inside me purrs
beautiful paintings,
painted jus wit words
got me lookin so deep into the picture
that the picture blurs
which is more than I deserve
Im here to get betta
Im jus a novice
so I observe
watch and listen
decipherin the depictions
followin,..but sometimes missin
the green light,
gettin lost beyond the curve
and its funny
cause this is jus off the shit
yall got in reserve..!!
but Im good
blessed that this community flourishes
so that I, one day, could
get betta, more cleva
w/out bein misunderstood
so fellas..,
AND queens,
ALL my beautiful black bellas
I appreciate ya skills
cause ya words are real
and the effect of their impact is beyond measure
so if you'll have me
it would be my absolute pleasure..
to call yall my case workers
this beautiful art of speech
serve as my work release
and have the Artist Village be my self imposed tether
Hater
Written November 4, 2009
who the fuck
are you to me,
supposedly,
that you should feel
your opinion is royalty
like I have to be subjected
to your view of me
what I do
and who I be
I'd never be a prisoner to your thoughts
but even if I was,
I'd still have the lock and key
sorry, Hater..
you're beyond your jurisdiction
there's a line of boundary
that you can't cross
cause beyond that point
you have no authority
my personal Constitution
forces you to seek retribution,
cause, over your words,
it exercises power and seniority
it allows me the right
to tell you anything you say
on this, or any other day
is invalid, your words are fake
jus like an allegory
you might as well be
in the same category
as implants, Florida votes
and a Van Gogh forgery
Im as real as it gets,
and for all those who can recoginize real,
Im sure you can recoginize this
Im so secure with myself
even to my haters
Im generous
and for a limited time,
Im givin out gift baskets of six
jus in time for Christmas
cause I could give a shit,
2 fucks, and 3 dicks
'bout what them haters spit
real talk
only OTHER haters validate they words
as legit
I dont have the energy,
nor the time to nitpick
Im too focused on me and mine
tryin to get the next thing
crossed off my "To Do" list
haters are jus ambiguous misfits
who hate that all of their pursuits
always seem to end up fruitless
hate to see 100% given
by some1 who's ambitious
so they try to take away
by addin their negative 2 cents
nothin to focus on in their own lives
so they focus in on "dis bitch"
and Im happy to oblige
Im glad I can temporarily give their lives some purpose
they have a mind to "mind" me
so I let them mind they bitness
from time to time
every1 needs alil reassurance
so when they hate on me
I jus take it as an indication
that it's evident to see,
Im on top of my game
like last name: Bryant,
first name: Kobe
and im gonna continue to go hard
that's jus my nature
ask any1 who knows me
so next time you out, feelin and lookin good
tryna enjoy the supposedly "grown & sexy" environment
and you catch word of them haters doin what they do,
talkin a whole bunch of nonsense
jus go up to them and tell them "Thanx..!!"
cause as they speak, they're jus boostin ya confidence
outta all those fine individuals there
you MUST be the finest..!!
think about it..!!?!
there has to be some sorta eliminational process
...with there bein a gazillion people there
and them personally chosin YOU as their target audience
where ever you go, haters are in the crowd
and usually they're the most prominent
but take it as good news,
them hatin on you..
jus means they're dissatisfied wit their OWN lives
and secretly admire what you do
stay focused and tru to you
keep it pushin, wit ya foot on the pedal
chuggin' up the duece
cause haters gonna hate, regardless..
not only jus 'cause you "fire"
but also jus ' cause they cant keep up wit you
who the fuck
are you to me,
supposedly,
that you should feel
your opinion is royalty
like I have to be subjected
to your view of me
what I do
and who I be
I'd never be a prisoner to your thoughts
but even if I was,
I'd still have the lock and key
sorry, Hater..
you're beyond your jurisdiction
there's a line of boundary
that you can't cross
cause beyond that point
you have no authority
my personal Constitution
forces you to seek retribution,
cause, over your words,
it exercises power and seniority
it allows me the right
to tell you anything you say
on this, or any other day
is invalid, your words are fake
jus like an allegory
you might as well be
in the same category
as implants, Florida votes
and a Van Gogh forgery
Im as real as it gets,
and for all those who can recoginize real,
Im sure you can recoginize this
Im so secure with myself
even to my haters
Im generous
and for a limited time,
Im givin out gift baskets of six
jus in time for Christmas
cause I could give a shit,
2 fucks, and 3 dicks
'bout what them haters spit
real talk
only OTHER haters validate they words
as legit
I dont have the energy,
nor the time to nitpick
Im too focused on me and mine
tryin to get the next thing
crossed off my "To Do" list
haters are jus ambiguous misfits
who hate that all of their pursuits
always seem to end up fruitless
hate to see 100% given
by some1 who's ambitious
so they try to take away
by addin their negative 2 cents
nothin to focus on in their own lives
so they focus in on "dis bitch"
and Im happy to oblige
Im glad I can temporarily give their lives some purpose
they have a mind to "mind" me
so I let them mind they bitness
from time to time
every1 needs alil reassurance
so when they hate on me
I jus take it as an indication
that it's evident to see,
Im on top of my game
like last name: Bryant,
first name: Kobe
and im gonna continue to go hard
that's jus my nature
ask any1 who knows me
so next time you out, feelin and lookin good
tryna enjoy the supposedly "grown & sexy" environment
and you catch word of them haters doin what they do,
talkin a whole bunch of nonsense
jus go up to them and tell them "Thanx..!!"
cause as they speak, they're jus boostin ya confidence
outta all those fine individuals there
you MUST be the finest..!!
think about it..!!?!
there has to be some sorta eliminational process
...with there bein a gazillion people there
and them personally chosin YOU as their target audience
where ever you go, haters are in the crowd
and usually they're the most prominent
but take it as good news,
them hatin on you..
jus means they're dissatisfied wit their OWN lives
and secretly admire what you do
stay focused and tru to you
keep it pushin, wit ya foot on the pedal
chuggin' up the duece
cause haters gonna hate, regardless..
not only jus 'cause you "fire"
but also jus ' cause they cant keep up wit you
Self Doubt (Bullshit)
Written July 6, 2009
Im only as good
as my last written letter
and when letters and words are your destiny
theres no room for error
cause that error could very well
be your lyfe long tether
and like the song says,
for "Always and Forever"
I know that I could be
SO much better
but the parody
of my reality
is that this creativity
is my only shelter
from myself,
the world,..
and the bullshit
that lurks in all places
industrial and rural
SO much bullshit
ya girl
cant stand it...
so much achin' in my legs
that I gotta sit
and while Im sittin
I gets to thinkin...
"can I ever rise above it..?"
negatively thinkin
my patience starts to wear thin
cause Im occupied,
growin frustrated,
wonderin
if all my newly harvested potential's prematurely peakin
not knowin
I jus dived head first into the bullshit I cant stand
self DOUBT begins to set in
so I start reachin,
disruptin the flow,
for higher plateaus
not watchin where my foot goes
solid ground is where I hoped to land
but ended up in lyrical quicksand
my creativity is strugglin
I feel myself sinkin
into obscurity
before any1 ever knows me
before I ever begin
(shakes head)
shoulda never started reachin
greatness would eventually come
but who wants to wait through the transition
such a terrible feelin
when the big fish lives in the ocean all her lyfe
then suddenly cant swim
oxygen low
panic striken
tight chest feelin
water in her lungs
drownin
I know it may sound like Im submerged
in the deep end
but thats what can happen
when, an extreme moment of doubt,
you experience
it only came to visit
but ya mental house kept it locked in
and since you gave it the power
its gonna kill ya dreams
like you breathed in a toxin
Im only as good
as my last written letter
and when letters and words are your destiny
theres no room for error
cause that error could very well
be your lyfe long tether
and like the song says,
for "Always and Forever"
I know that I could be
SO much better
but the parody
of my reality
is that this creativity
is my only shelter
from myself,
the world,..
and the bullshit
that lurks in all places
industrial and rural
SO much bullshit
ya girl
cant stand it...
so much achin' in my legs
that I gotta sit
and while Im sittin
I gets to thinkin...
"can I ever rise above it..?"
negatively thinkin
my patience starts to wear thin
cause Im occupied,
growin frustrated,
wonderin
if all my newly harvested potential's prematurely peakin
not knowin
I jus dived head first into the bullshit I cant stand
self DOUBT begins to set in
so I start reachin,
disruptin the flow,
for higher plateaus
not watchin where my foot goes
solid ground is where I hoped to land
but ended up in lyrical quicksand
my creativity is strugglin
I feel myself sinkin
into obscurity
before any1 ever knows me
before I ever begin
(shakes head)
shoulda never started reachin
greatness would eventually come
but who wants to wait through the transition
such a terrible feelin
when the big fish lives in the ocean all her lyfe
then suddenly cant swim
oxygen low
panic striken
tight chest feelin
water in her lungs
drownin
I know it may sound like Im submerged
in the deep end
but thats what can happen
when, an extreme moment of doubt,
you experience
it only came to visit
but ya mental house kept it locked in
and since you gave it the power
its gonna kill ya dreams
like you breathed in a toxin
Ulterior Moive
Written July 5, 2009
I was SO tempted
Lord knows I was
but stayed tru to self
despite the buzz
despite the luv
feed off the chemistry
of old romantic energy
hopin you'd get a taste
of my sexual remedy
the cure to the monotony
of your virus version
of monogamy
hindsight
they say
is 20/20
and Id have to agree
cause now
through the bullshit
I can clearly see
up
she couldnt get it
so you come to me
but you know it wont be
THAT easy
so, plain and outright
you couldnt be
cause you knew if you posed the question
what my answer
would surely be
so you take your time
kept your eyes on me
waitin for jus the right
opportunity
when Im all smiles
and feelin free
like the beloved queen of
Faded City
like "this gonna be
jus TOO easy
I got this, homie..
lock and key"
and here I am
silly me
thinkin I got you
and you got me
worried bout these other niggas
not the one WITH me
like I said
silly me
fuck base one and two
you goin straight for three
through the smoke and haze
I begin to see
what everyone else watchin
like TV
my ex old man
tryna fuck wit me
tryna beat it like MJ
R.I.P
and its not helpin
that im feelin so crazy
from the weed and 'Tron
and my eyes heavy
plus he sayin all the right thangs
to saturate the putang
got me thinkin bout the last time
he gave me dope brain
....!!
(...psss...psss...)
but Im hearin somethin tell me
lets not get crazy
MD is bein shady
he went about it
THIS way!!??!!
then he got a lady
who everybody say kool
plus they got a baby
my head geats to clearin
and my buzz starts to
wear thin
perfect timin
cause the nigga almost had his dick in
Im sayin
"WHAT THE FUCK!!!"
cause reality
is sickenin'
niggas ALWAYS wanna talk
but never wanna be
"jus friends"
I was SO tempted
Lord knows I was
but stayed tru to self
despite the buzz
despite the luv
feed off the chemistry
of old romantic energy
hopin you'd get a taste
of my sexual remedy
the cure to the monotony
of your virus version
of monogamy
hindsight
they say
is 20/20
and Id have to agree
cause now
through the bullshit
I can clearly see
up
she couldnt get it
so you come to me
but you know it wont be
THAT easy
so, plain and outright
you couldnt be
cause you knew if you posed the question
what my answer
would surely be
so you take your time
kept your eyes on me
waitin for jus the right
opportunity
when Im all smiles
and feelin free
like the beloved queen of
Faded City
like "this gonna be
jus TOO easy
I got this, homie..
lock and key"
and here I am
silly me
thinkin I got you
and you got me
worried bout these other niggas
not the one WITH me
like I said
silly me
fuck base one and two
you goin straight for three
through the smoke and haze
I begin to see
what everyone else watchin
like TV
my ex old man
tryna fuck wit me
tryna beat it like MJ
R.I.P
and its not helpin
that im feelin so crazy
from the weed and 'Tron
and my eyes heavy
plus he sayin all the right thangs
to saturate the putang
got me thinkin bout the last time
he gave me dope brain
....!!
(...psss...psss...)
but Im hearin somethin tell me
lets not get crazy
MD is bein shady
he went about it
THIS way!!??!!
then he got a lady
who everybody say kool
plus they got a baby
my head geats to clearin
and my buzz starts to
wear thin
perfect timin
cause the nigga almost had his dick in
Im sayin
"WHAT THE FUCK!!!"
cause reality
is sickenin'
niggas ALWAYS wanna talk
but never wanna be
"jus friends"
Luv's Witchcraft
Written July 5, 2009
....
for you
my heart would flutter
I luved you
like I would luv no other
my heart sang your song...
beautifully
but for others..
it could only muster up a..st..
stutter...
I needed you..
WANTED
YOU!!!
I never meant to hurt
YOU!!
never wanted
Code:Blue
I hoped
for you
to understand..
from the situation
I wish
I had
clean hands..
but..
all things bein equal
dont you think
that Im a fool
I know
how you are
I know
how you do
(..I know the tradition
of N.O.L.A. Voodoo..)
I hurt myself
when I hurt you
but you couldnt tell
you had no clue
you were in pain
..thats ALL you knew
(..birds of a feather...)
so you flew
past the guilt for the deed
you'd do
numbed it all
blocked it off
movin fast
(..sonic blast..)
steady past
your conscience,
through
had to suppress
the luv you knew
in order for me
to hurt like you
so you chopped
my heart
in two
began the fire
started the rue
added 3 parts of stock
2 parts of heart
1 part of salt
set it aflame
gave it a taste
then watched it brew
of revengeful concoctions
you had a slew
but nothin's better
to mend together
a once broken heart
than Broken Heart Stew
....
metaphor
....
for you
my heart would flutter
I luved you
like I would luv no other
my heart sang your song...
beautifully
but for others..
it could only muster up a..st..
stutter...
I needed you..
WANTED
YOU!!!
I never meant to hurt
YOU!!
never wanted
Code:Blue
I hoped
for you
to understand..
from the situation
I wish
I had
clean hands..
but..
all things bein equal
dont you think
that Im a fool
I know
how you are
I know
how you do
(..I know the tradition
of N.O.L.A. Voodoo..)
I hurt myself
when I hurt you
but you couldnt tell
you had no clue
you were in pain
..thats ALL you knew
(..birds of a feather...)
so you flew
past the guilt for the deed
you'd do
numbed it all
blocked it off
movin fast
(..sonic blast..)
steady past
your conscience,
through
had to suppress
the luv you knew
in order for me
to hurt like you
so you chopped
my heart
in two
began the fire
started the rue
added 3 parts of stock
2 parts of heart
1 part of salt
set it aflame
gave it a taste
then watched it brew
of revengeful concoctions
you had a slew
but nothin's better
to mend together
a once broken heart
than Broken Heart Stew
....
metaphor
A 2nd Chance
Written June 4, 2009
Damn..!!!
even after all this time
you still appeal to me
physically
mentally
spiritually
beautiful
black
man
you are
the epitome
its a good look..
most definitely
youre on ya game
bout ya bizness
you "doin you"
but the better look
would be
you "doin me"
you see,
once again
Ive fallen..
like the season-
when the leaves
part from the tree
I want you
all for me
selfishly
dont wanna step on toes
but we've got history
like Cleopatra
and Anthony
Ossie Davis
and Ruby Dee
black luv
equates to
you and me
not you and she
I know mami' luvs you
her sentiment is sweet as tea
but she has one deficiency
she's no "me"
im a dime
and she's a sixpence
...and thats on a good day!
which means
at best
she's a "3+3"
excuse my frankness
but you know me
not bein rude
jus speakin what i see
and not jus speakin
figuratively
or literally
im speakin full spectrum
whole picture
360
you can do better
you should be with
the female equivalent
of yourself
(because greatness begets greatness)
and thats me
together
we'd be
black royalty
only thing between us
would be a wealth of knowledge, luv and prosperity
helping one another get to the place
where we each strive to be
continuously
creating
a better you
a better me
therefore
a stronger "we"
I see it crystal clear
20/20
our reality
could be others fantasy
if only given the opportunity
so I pose the question....
"how do you feel about givin a second chance
to you and me?"
Damn..!!!
even after all this time
you still appeal to me
physically
mentally
spiritually
beautiful
black
man
you are
the epitome
its a good look..
most definitely
youre on ya game
bout ya bizness
you "doin you"
but the better look
would be
you "doin me"
you see,
once again
Ive fallen..
like the season-
when the leaves
part from the tree
I want you
all for me
selfishly
dont wanna step on toes
but we've got history
like Cleopatra
and Anthony
Ossie Davis
and Ruby Dee
black luv
equates to
you and me
not you and she
I know mami' luvs you
her sentiment is sweet as tea
but she has one deficiency
she's no "me"
im a dime
and she's a sixpence
...and thats on a good day!
which means
at best
she's a "3+3"
excuse my frankness
but you know me
not bein rude
jus speakin what i see
and not jus speakin
figuratively
or literally
im speakin full spectrum
whole picture
360
you can do better
you should be with
the female equivalent
of yourself
(because greatness begets greatness)
and thats me
together
we'd be
black royalty
only thing between us
would be a wealth of knowledge, luv and prosperity
helping one another get to the place
where we each strive to be
continuously
creating
a better you
a better me
therefore
a stronger "we"
I see it crystal clear
20/20
our reality
could be others fantasy
if only given the opportunity
so I pose the question....
"how do you feel about givin a second chance
to you and me?"
The Next Phase
Written May 20, 2009
went to San Antone
but now Im back
to where I call home
stepped off the plane runnin
no more moves
Im tryna postpone
harness all my skills
so that its evident
they've been honed
creatively,
Ive SO grown
learned to shape
manipulate
words
so theyre meanins
transform
like water into clouds
leavin you soaked
within my brainstorm
3rd string
dead wrong
2nd best
bygone
lyrically adept
so 'bout now my shit is dead on
no longer waiting
on the sidelines
i think its time for me to get "on"
no more
fieldgoals
im lookin for
high scores
and that means
goin long
T.D.'s
END ZONE!!
cant you see it?!!
my throne
wait a minute..
hold on....
.....
whats that you say..?
under your breathe
and out the way
..y do you feel the need
to "hate"?!!!
..cause you know Im sweet,
like carmel cake..?!
..skills have zeal
and procreate..?!!
must suck
when ya shit's juvenile
like Easy Bake
maturing takes time
trust me,
it aint too late (lol)
but right now
jus shake me hand
and acknowledge fate
I AM GREAT!!!
destined to change it up
in a major way
so come on, luv
dont play
do you wanna feel
lyrical
dismay?!!
dont wanna hurt you
but could do it all day
have you meet ya maker
then,..
for you
I'd pray
pour alil liquor and then walk away
so enough, .
ok?!!
I dont wanna take you down that road
today
bow out gracefully
and, alive
you'll stay
give me my due
then we can part ways
cause my words produce fire
and presented with the chance,
on you..
Id blaze
leavin you dazed and defeated
while Smokey The Bear
is singin my praise (wtf!!)
HOT DAMN..!!
I NEED A SECOND!!..
..............
MYSELF,
I AMAZE!!!!
guess thats enough
for jus one day
but please stay seated
comin up's
the next phase...
went to San Antone
but now Im back
to where I call home
stepped off the plane runnin
no more moves
Im tryna postpone
harness all my skills
so that its evident
they've been honed
creatively,
Ive SO grown
learned to shape
manipulate
words
so theyre meanins
transform
like water into clouds
leavin you soaked
within my brainstorm
3rd string
dead wrong
2nd best
bygone
lyrically adept
so 'bout now my shit is dead on
no longer waiting
on the sidelines
i think its time for me to get "on"
no more
fieldgoals
im lookin for
high scores
and that means
goin long
T.D.'s
END ZONE!!
cant you see it?!!
my throne
wait a minute..
hold on....
.....
whats that you say..?
under your breathe
and out the way
..y do you feel the need
to "hate"?!!!
..cause you know Im sweet,
like carmel cake..?!
..skills have zeal
and procreate..?!!
must suck
when ya shit's juvenile
like Easy Bake
maturing takes time
trust me,
it aint too late (lol)
but right now
jus shake me hand
and acknowledge fate
I AM GREAT!!!
destined to change it up
in a major way
so come on, luv
dont play
do you wanna feel
lyrical
dismay?!!
dont wanna hurt you
but could do it all day
have you meet ya maker
then,..
for you
I'd pray
pour alil liquor and then walk away
so enough, .
ok?!!
I dont wanna take you down that road
today
bow out gracefully
and, alive
you'll stay
give me my due
then we can part ways
cause my words produce fire
and presented with the chance,
on you..
Id blaze
leavin you dazed and defeated
while Smokey The Bear
is singin my praise (wtf!!)
HOT DAMN..!!
I NEED A SECOND!!..
..............
MYSELF,
I AMAZE!!!!
guess thats enough
for jus one day
but please stay seated
comin up's
the next phase...
Tragedy
Written May 19, 2009
I want you to miss me
I WANT YOU TO MISS ME
I wanna be
on your mind
all the time
so that you cant sleep
cant think
cant eat
cant talk
cant
be...
without me
then
possibly
you'd see
the result of what you did to me
gave you everything
EVERYTHING!!
all of me
all my heart
every beat
my entire lyfe was in your hands
and therefore
yours to keep
and it was given
willingly
cost to you was
NOTHING!!!
FREE!!!
and all I asked
in exchange
was nothing more than
honesty
loyality
empathy
priority
simply put
just honor me
when I said I thought this was fair
your response was
"I agree"
but here you are
before me now
sayin "sorry"
sayin "please"
"it was purely sexual,
couldnt hold a candle
to you and me!!!
I couldnt bare you leavin me
I'd be stripped and scarred in strife
for all my lyfe
..FOREVER!!!
for all to see
I'm beggin, bay!!!
I'm on my knees!!!!!"
now you get it
now you see
now you understand
the severity
completely dismantled and distroyed
something that was
meant to be
and its such a tragedy
TRAVESTY
broke my heart
in more than two
possibly
even more than three
so of course
I want you to experience
all my pain and all my grief
the burnin of my heart
is what inflames me
and you're gonna experience it
sure enough
3rd degree
so much so that
you cant sleep
cant think
cant eat
cant talk
cant
be
then....
maybe
you'll humor me
and tell me
who was hurt more by your actions, baby
you
or
me
I want you to miss me
I WANT YOU TO MISS ME
I wanna be
on your mind
all the time
so that you cant sleep
cant think
cant eat
cant talk
cant
be...
without me
then
possibly
you'd see
the result of what you did to me
gave you everything
EVERYTHING!!
all of me
all my heart
every beat
my entire lyfe was in your hands
and therefore
yours to keep
and it was given
willingly
cost to you was
NOTHING!!!
FREE!!!
and all I asked
in exchange
was nothing more than
honesty
loyality
empathy
priority
simply put
just honor me
when I said I thought this was fair
your response was
"I agree"
but here you are
before me now
sayin "sorry"
sayin "please"
"it was purely sexual,
couldnt hold a candle
to you and me!!!
I couldnt bare you leavin me
I'd be stripped and scarred in strife
for all my lyfe
..FOREVER!!!
for all to see
I'm beggin, bay!!!
I'm on my knees!!!!!"
now you get it
now you see
now you understand
the severity
completely dismantled and distroyed
something that was
meant to be
and its such a tragedy
TRAVESTY
broke my heart
in more than two
possibly
even more than three
so of course
I want you to experience
all my pain and all my grief
the burnin of my heart
is what inflames me
and you're gonna experience it
sure enough
3rd degree
so much so that
you cant sleep
cant think
cant eat
cant talk
cant
be
then....
maybe
you'll humor me
and tell me
who was hurt more by your actions, baby
you
or
me
Moments That Indicate My Fate
Written May 18, 2009
its moments like this
that make me want to re-live our time together
not jus reminisce
moments like this
that cause me to
contemplate
frustrate
interrogate
the particulars of our scenario
wonderin
ultimately,
what was the deciding variable
that made us part ways
and space
moments like this
when I can do nothing
but contest
the second coming
of a luv sublime
because in my mind
no reason
or rhyme
could profess
or
furthermore,
manifest
the kind of luv
that perpetuates
while stayin frozen
in time
the fault was mine
I confess
but in moments such as these
that revelation
does nothing
to put my mind
or heart
at rest
it jus inflames
the pain
of a luv slain
buried deep in my chest
its moments like these
when I wish I could
clean my slate
leave the table
because I cleared my plate
emotions
exterminate
like a great foe
take its head
then castrate
but it seems an impossible feat
my feelings wont abate
I asked the Divine
for a sign
to demonstrate
if this,
shall in fact,
be my fate
and I suppose
I received my answer
because
moments like these
have increased and multiplied
like cancer
becoming more agonizing and mind-consuming
as of late
its moments like this
that make me want to re-live our time together
not jus reminisce
moments like this
that cause me to
contemplate
frustrate
interrogate
the particulars of our scenario
wonderin
ultimately,
what was the deciding variable
that made us part ways
and space
moments like this
when I can do nothing
but contest
the second coming
of a luv sublime
because in my mind
no reason
or rhyme
could profess
or
furthermore,
manifest
the kind of luv
that perpetuates
while stayin frozen
in time
the fault was mine
I confess
but in moments such as these
that revelation
does nothing
to put my mind
or heart
at rest
it jus inflames
the pain
of a luv slain
buried deep in my chest
its moments like these
when I wish I could
clean my slate
leave the table
because I cleared my plate
emotions
exterminate
like a great foe
take its head
then castrate
but it seems an impossible feat
my feelings wont abate
I asked the Divine
for a sign
to demonstrate
if this,
shall in fact,
be my fate
and I suppose
I received my answer
because
moments like these
have increased and multiplied
like cancer
becoming more agonizing and mind-consuming
as of late
Spellbound
Written May 17, 2009
the thought of you entices me so
that the very glimpse of recollection
causes me to salivate
like a wide-eyed fiend
who's finally set his sights on blow
demure....?
no
infatuation....?
one could suppose
but the immense length of time
for which you've saturated my mind
leaving me without words
and blind
to the advances
and romances
of the undivine
is testiment
to the depth this luv goes
my mind falls on you
and it's eye becomes focused
emotional state
transcends bliss
soul searching
cease and desist
because mentally
you're in view
and surprisingly
the idea of whole-heartedly,
giving oneself to another
no longer seems askew
at least when this idea is applied to you
I very much delight in entertaining that
furthermore
adding to the effect
is the undeniable beauty of our union
our pack
which is sustained
moreso spiritually than physically
but best believe the "physicality" of it never lacks
your elegance in conversation
as well as musical communication
gives verbal
and mental stimulation
that counteracts
and completely paints black
the ranting and rambling of lesser men
who try as they might
to get me on my back
you have the prowess they lack
a finess
that gets me to my climax
my version of your ejaculation
through multiple sessions
of mental masturbation
forgive me
I digress
the whole of the matter is
my soul,
heart,
mind,
and body
you possess
and I've gone topsy tervy
"spellbound"
tryin to convey
no less
the thought of you entices me so
that the very glimpse of recollection
causes me to salivate
like a wide-eyed fiend
who's finally set his sights on blow
demure....?
no
infatuation....?
one could suppose
but the immense length of time
for which you've saturated my mind
leaving me without words
and blind
to the advances
and romances
of the undivine
is testiment
to the depth this luv goes
my mind falls on you
and it's eye becomes focused
emotional state
transcends bliss
soul searching
cease and desist
because mentally
you're in view
and surprisingly
the idea of whole-heartedly,
giving oneself to another
no longer seems askew
at least when this idea is applied to you
I very much delight in entertaining that
furthermore
adding to the effect
is the undeniable beauty of our union
our pack
which is sustained
moreso spiritually than physically
but best believe the "physicality" of it never lacks
your elegance in conversation
as well as musical communication
gives verbal
and mental stimulation
that counteracts
and completely paints black
the ranting and rambling of lesser men
who try as they might
to get me on my back
you have the prowess they lack
a finess
that gets me to my climax
my version of your ejaculation
through multiple sessions
of mental masturbation
forgive me
I digress
the whole of the matter is
my soul,
heart,
mind,
and body
you possess
and I've gone topsy tervy
"spellbound"
tryin to convey
no less
A Luv That Sustains
Written May 16, 2009
I luved a man, ..once
...
a luv so intense and tru
with intentions pure and outright
it was a luv so delicately complex,
yet elegantly simple
he put a dimple in my heart
for when I smiled at him, and he smiled back
I felt anew
it had become much more than "jus another luv"
... a "feelin"...
he had become the very essence of my bein
I could surely exist entirely for him and his pleasure
or forfeit my own lyfe, in exchange for his own
interchangeably
and my answer to "what are your feelin's on how you spent your lyfe?"
would still be
"Good."
he was the center of my universe
the very breath of my lyfe
and how lucky I feel, now
to have luved this incredible man....
...and have him luv ME
too..!!
...that he could be the food that sustains my lyfe
not jus for one lyfetime
but for two
I luved a man, ..once
...
a luv so intense and tru
with intentions pure and outright
it was a luv so delicately complex,
yet elegantly simple
he put a dimple in my heart
for when I smiled at him, and he smiled back
I felt anew
it had become much more than "jus another luv"
... a "feelin"...
he had become the very essence of my bein
I could surely exist entirely for him and his pleasure
or forfeit my own lyfe, in exchange for his own
interchangeably
and my answer to "what are your feelin's on how you spent your lyfe?"
would still be
"Good."
he was the center of my universe
the very breath of my lyfe
and how lucky I feel, now
to have luved this incredible man....
...and have him luv ME
too..!!
...that he could be the food that sustains my lyfe
not jus for one lyfetime
but for two
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